As you have already heard in my previous blog post, the first day of week zero was definitely fun. So much fun that I cried about it. For many nights. Yes. It was that exciting. But it starts to get even better.
I can't remember which days exactly this all happened (it was zero week, the week that 99% of all Airmen block out of their memories), so I'm going to blog about how I wrote it down.
First of all, we got our haircuts. This was exciting. We had to march all the way to a facility that cut our hair and also gave us our initial clothing (ABU's, boots, underpants, socks, and sand t-shirts). Haircuts wasn't so bad for me... I was actually looking forward to it. My hair was short to start out with. Less to deal with during BMT, correct? Well, most of the trainees had hair down to their shoulders and it was a real pain for them to get their hair cut. All of us came out of that building with red heads and awkward shapes and scars on our heads. I swear the barbers were trying to open our heads with their buzzers because they pushed down so hard to get the most hair off of our heads.
We then got our initial clothing issue. This was exciting because we all got clothes that sort of fit, but not quite. My top cut into my armpits a little too much, so I complained and I got a bigger top. Woot. We all were given our combat boots, and we looked at them as if we had no clue what a combat boot looked like. They had to be laced a certain way, and we had no clue. None whatsoever.
Once again, there was a lot of yelling. We had to march everywhere from appointment to appointment. This was a the first time we have ever had to march for a lot of us. We looked like a bag of smashed assholes. It was bad. Our arm-swing was non-existent. We were all out of step. We had no idea what foot to land on when we heard "Left... left... left, right, left." No idea. I was road-guard at the time (I was about 6 paces in front of the flight and I basically led the flight off cliffs if need be) so I was always being yelled at for everything. Being out of step. Not being far ahead enough of the flight. Etc.
Back in the dorms, we kinda put everything in our lockers as we saw fit... until we were told how to put everything in lockers. Oh my goodness, talk about OCD. Everything had to be freakin' perfect. No strings on any piece of clothing, no wrinkles, everything flush with each other, grounded, put in the right position, bathing items perfectly clean, neatness, "attention to detail", everything.
So after we were half shocked to death about the perfectness of our lockers and what they had to be, we marched our scared little butts to the immunization room! I was so scared of needles at the time. So scared. We all got in a little line and got injected shots. I got 1 shot on both arms at the same time and another on my left arm. I found out that I'm a bleeder. The shots weren't nearly as bad as I thought. The needle ain't even that long, and the needle retracts really quickly once the shot is done being injected. Woo!!!! Then I got half my body's blood taken out of me for testing to see if I had any STD, HIV, AIDS, SUVS, the sort.
During zero week, we also had physical evals. I sandbagged everything. Which mean that I didn't try nearly as hard as I could have so I could easily improve my score later. This eventually bit me in the butt, but I'll get to that later. We had a pushup test, situp test, and a 1.5 mile run test. Nothing special to report here.
Our first breakfast we had was the worst one. We all lined up in front of the dining facility in formation, and we have this thing called the Chow Runner. What the chow runner does is report the flight into the dining facility and tells us where to sit. Thank goodness I was not the chow runner (but I got experience in the 319th... once again, I'll explain later). The chow runner couldn't figure out what to say. He screwed up a lot trying to get us in the dining facility, and the TI ended up having fun with him anyways. When the TI gets mad, he drops his notebook on the floor and shakes his arms in the air and says something to the respect of "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, CRAZY?!?!?!" Lol.
We went into the dining facility and oh my word... we got screamed at for nearly ANYTHING that came our way. We got screamed at for looking at TI's, for holding the fork wrong, sitting wrong, or not eating fast enough. This was a big one. We ate so fast.... that when I eat in the civilian world, it looks like I'm eating slow compared to when I ate at the BMT dining facility. We had a total of 5 minutes (maybe 3) to eat a full tray of food and drink 3 glasses of liquids (2 waters and 1 gatorade of your choosing). I swear there was something in the gatorade. Like a drug that stops attraction to women or something. I swear there is something in there. After we eat, we took our trays to the washers and marched out of the facility and got back in formation for something new to learn or to get yelled at for some reason.
That's about it for zero week. Just a lot of yelling and teaching of the basics of BMT. We only got one phone call at the end of the week to call our parents and tell them what's going on. It lasted 15 minutes. That was one hard phone call to make. I was having major 2nd thoughts and everything at that time. My next blog will be about week one and its many adventures....
Wes... a bag of "smashed what??" ROFLMAO!
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